Because We Are

There are so many days when I am lounging around the house, wearing sweatpants and a baggie t-shirt (usually belonging to my 6’8″ husband), my hair wet and frizzy thrown up in a sloppy bun, no makeup on my face, dark circles around my eyes…and my husband will still come home and tell me how beautiful I look.My initial reactions usually sound something like this:

“You are crazy!” OR

“No I’m not!” OR

“You are just biased! You have to say that because you married me.” OR

“Yeah right!”

Then I have to remind myself…he really believes I’m beautiful. I should just be thankful for that! I wake up in the morning sometimes with puffy allergy eyes and crusty slobber dried up on my face, and he still thinks I was beautiful (he tells me all the time). How lucky am I?!The thing is…I think many women have a hard time accepting compliments.  I know I do. I have to remind myself to be grateful for compliments and to try to accept them with grace and elegance…with a nice thank you. If someone is telling you that you look great today, or that you are incredibly smart, or that new recipe you made tastes great…then it is true!!! By golly, be proud of it! (Yes, I just said by golly!)

I will admit it…most days I don’t feel beautiful when I’m not wearing my makeup…or if my hair is not fixed. I will also admit that I do not have a positive body image every single day. And some days are…dare I say it…”fat days.” This has to end. Along with having a hard time accepting compliments, I feel like many women also have a problem with their inner dialogue. How many times do you look in the mirror and think, “Man, I look fat in this.” This is a problem that I need to work on…that all women need to work on together. The word “fat” should be eliminated from the dictionary…from all our minds.

I read a wonderful book called Who Calls Me Beautiful by Regina Franklin, and one of my favorite quotes from the book is, “The key to finding my beauty is not in the transformation of my body, but in the transformation of my mind.” (You can find another one of favorite quotes from this book here.) This is so true! Let’s start telling ourselves that we look beautiful…gorgeous…exquisite…EVERYDAY!

So…I was having a couple of these so-called “fat days” earlier this week. (Don’t worry, Mom!) I’ve come to realize that these days mean nothing to me anymore. I know that I am not fat…and I think I’ve come a long way to be able to admit when I am having one these days. However, reading another blogger’s post yesterday inspired me to overcome it. I was intrigued when she asked the question, “What do you love about your body?”

I thought about it a little bit, and there are actually soooo many things that I love about my body. It is able to do SO much!

The best answer I could think of at the time was that I love my back. It is a part of my body that I do not see very much, and honestly it doesn’t get very much attention. I can turn and twist my neck to try to view it in the mirror, but for the most part, I don’t know very much about what my back looks like. I do know that, as I have started lifting weights this year, my back is getting stronger and stronger!

However, I feel as though my back is probably very beautiful.So, I am posing a challenge to myself and to other women out there. Let’s put an end to these “fat days” and fat talk, and let’s work on transforming our minds so that we can believe it when someone calls us beautiful…

…because we are.



19 thoughts on “Because We Are

  1. Hey Ang,

    I LOVE your blog! I live in Boston by myself and have my share of rough days with no one here to turn to. I always feel so inspired and seem to always smile when I read your blogs! Thanks for that.

    PS ~ Your mom’s soaps are amazing! I have my whole family using them!

    • Ashley,
      I am so glad you are reading! I moved to Warrensburg, which isn’t far (especially compared to Boston!) but I don’t know anyone here, so blogging has helped me a lot to keep in touch with family and friends and to connect with new people. I was beginning to feel really lonely here before I started my blog.
      Good luck in Boston! Stay in touch!

    • when did you grow up, I miss my baby girl but am so proud of the young woman she has become, your very smart and beautiful! And your back is lovely…………………and another entire family is using my soaps too! 🙂 yeah!

  2. After reading your post, I asked myself what I find beautiful about my body too. I realizes that I actually like a lot. Thanks for helping me remember how we are all indeed beautiful.

  3. What a great post! Every girl should take the time to stop and appreciate their beauty because we all spend waaaay too much time critiquing it!! So thank you for the reminder and making me smile. Have you ever heard of Operation Beautiful?? If you haven’t check it out, so simple yet incredibly inspiring!

  4. Angela-
    Thank you for this post. Sooo many days of mine are filled with awful thoughts/opinions about myself and how I look, that I never bother to think of the good things. Thanks for reminding me of that. You’ve inspired me to make a post all on it’s own. 🙂 I love you- keep the awesome blogging up.

    • Thank you Heather! You are beautiful inside and out, and you are an amazing photographer…I keep using my wedding photos on my posts! (Recognize these?)

  5. You are truly beautiful Angela, inside and out ! I love this post, and I know just from reading that you really are just a sweet girl with a big heart and I love that! I don’t like fake people : p

    We all have our ‘off days’ , which is what I call it, but we just have to think of the things we are lucky to have, even walking and talking is something we are blessed to do everyday, some people can’t even do that, love ya girl!!!!

    Your back is pretty hot! I agree!

  6. I definitely have a tough time accepting compliments, especially those from my husband. Outwardly, I know that he truly means what he says, but inwardly I feel that he’s just saying these things to make me feel better about myself.
    I’m so glad that you’re committed to self-love. It’s something I’m definitely working on.

  7. I read somewhere that a women photographed herself daily for weeks. Before taking the pic she documented how she felt that day about her body. Wouldnt you know that while she may have been having a ‘fat’ day her body looked exactly the same in every photo. The mind is such a powerful tool (that can be either pos or negative). Im with you on the elimination of those fat talk days!

  8. Great post! There is so much “fat talk” out there. Women (and some men!) are always complaining about their fat thighs, flabby stomachs and muffin tops or asking if they look fat in this outfit or disgusting in this picture? I try to encourage women every day to be more positive about themselves and their bodies. I think by living a healthy lifestyle and incorporating nutritious foods and exercise into their daily routine women can slowly become more positive.

    I’m fortunate to have a husband who tells me I am beautiful all of the time too (even at 33 weeks pregnant!). All women deserve this and I would encourage you single ladies to keep looking until you find the man that you deserve. 🙂 Don’t settle for less! You are beautiful!

  9. loved this post – so timely for me too! after a lot of travel and not a lot of exercise, i’m trying really hard to not beat myself up about it – it’s just a few days! not the end of the world. this was a great reminder that we (as women) need to give ourselves the credit we deserve and appreciate the beautiful women we are!

    good luck on your half tomorrow!!

  10. I love your blog! I def have a hard time accepting compliments especially when I am have one of those “fat” days. This post was exactly what I needed as of late. I have to pick up that book somewhere too, it looks awesome!
    Thanks for being so inspiring!

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